went and worked out again with Mike. Started doing squats again.  I did them in college for a workout study.  I got up to doing 3 sets of 12 reps of 120 pounds!  I want to work my weight up to that again!

Made dinner with noodles and chicken.  It’s amazing to see how little calories you really have haha  This is hard, but hopefully I can stick with it!

got called off work tonight so went and worked out with my boyfriend..felt great! made a salad for dinner and 1% chocolate milk (its actually healthy to drink chocolate milk after a workout..much better than those protein shakes!). 

Love that my boyfriend loves me how i am now and also helps me to be healthier! :) hes a keeper!

Size:  varies-have a size 4 that fits and a size 9 haha why cant all stores be the same size?!

Age: 25

Current weight: 136

Goal Weight: 105-115..so lets say 110 for now

Favorite Diet Food?  carrots and cucumbers 

Favorite Binge Food?:  pasta

Favorite Exercise?: biking, fast walking, and leg press

Favorite Thinspo? my sister

What Makes You Slip Up? I work night shift at a hospital, and it is harder to eat right and have energy to exercise during the day

What Makes You Strong?  sister and mom, and seeing how far I have come (emotionally) from my past!

When Did It Start? high school 

How Many Calories Do You Consume A Day? some days I only eat a bowl of cereal, other days it could be 2000.

What Do You See When You Look In The Mirror? rolls and rolls of skin. saggy boobs, thunder thighs-but i do think I have a pretty face :)

Are You Depressed?  nope! my life is actually fantastic right now!

Ever Tried To Commit Suicide? no, been depressed before-used to cut myself..but never suicide. 

Ever Been To A Psychologist?  yepp!

Are You On Any Medication?  one..and sometimes a xanax if work was too crazy the night before..hopefully with working out more this can help that!

I AM/HAVE -                            PEOPLE -

[] anorexic (ana)                    [] ask if I’m ana/mia
[] ednos                               [] call me fat
[] bulimic (mia)                      [] say I’m skinny.
[x] binge ED                          [] say I’m ugly
[] hungry                              [x] say I’m pretty 
[x] thirsty                             [] spread rumors about me
[] drinking something            [] force me to eat
[] eating something               [] say I eat too much
[] under 100 lbs                    [x] wish I’d eat more
[] starving myself                  [] don’t know I’m mia/ana
[] participating in a fast          [] have tried to stop me

I WISH -                                            I LOVE -

[x] I could be thin(ner)                     [x] feeling hungry
[x] I could have a better body          [x] seeing a difference
[] I didn’t have to eat                     [] shaking
[x] I could control myself                [] being weak
[] I was under 100lbs                    [x] losing weight
[] I could avoid food                      [] having an eating disorder
[] I could hide what I am                [x] green tea
[x] I could not be fat                        [] diet pills
[] I could be prettier                      [x] being able to turn down food
[] I could have a boy/girlfriend      [x] feeling good about myself  
[] I could disappear

I HATE -                                 I NEED -

[x] when people stare            [] more support
[] being asked questions      [] people to stay out of my business
[x] having to eat                   [] more friends
[] being single                      [] someone to talk to
[] wearing short skirts          [x] less food
[x] being fat                         [x] more water
[x] looking ugly                    [] a gym membership

[x] feeling this way               [] to lose 30+ pounds
[] fat people                         [X] to lose 10+ pounds

                                            [] to lose 100+ pounds

So after reading and seeing so many pages about weight loss, I decided to start my own.  I do not have a ton of weight to lose, but I just cannot seem to get started!  I decided that if I actually post a pic of myself online for everyone (who wants to) see, that will encourage me to start losing the weight/tone up.

I want to lose the weight for a few reasons:

1. be healthier

2. this is the most I have ever weighed, and I do not like the weight I look or feel

3. I have a bachelors degree in Dietetics (basically nutrition science)…I am ashamed I am overweight for my height

4. My boyfriend and I are getting super serious and are talking about getting married..if he proposes, I want to look and feel great at the possible wedding!  So I want to start losing weight now!

Ever since I went to college, my weight has been everywhere!  I was in an abusive relationship freshman year and got down to about 90 pounds..for my 4’10” frame, I understand that it actually my ideal body weight (from what I learned in class), but I looked too skinny. I put weight back on and felt great!  The relationship ended and after a while I finally got back to being happy (three years later…oh well).  Two years later, I was put on medication for anxiety.  I felt better after taking it (because it was working..duh haha) and I stopped taking my meds..I put on 20 pounds instantly!  It was terrible..So right now, I am still trying to get those 20 pounds off..well I guess I am not doing anything to get them off..I am just “wishing” them off..  Seeing that it is getting me no where…to the gym I go! haha

Sorry for such a long intro..I have never had a page like this.  Wish me luck!